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what is everybody favorite joke

ME!

j/k

Actually, my favorite joke is probably not for younger ears, but here's a quick one I always enjoyed for some reason:

What's red and green and spins real fast?
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A frog in a blender.

Sorry, I have a twisted sense of humor.

Okay guys- now you've got me started:

"So there were two muffins sitting in the oven and one turned to the other and said "MAN- it's HOT in here!" The other replied in a very horrified tone "AHHHHHHHHHH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

~*~*~*~*~

"There were two blondes on opposite sides of a lake. One turned to the other and yelled "HEY! HOW DO YOU GET TO THE OTHER SIDE?" The other blonde looked around then after a moment yelled back. "YOU ARE ON THE OTHER SIDE!"

~*~*~*~*~

"There was a man doing home improvements on his house when his neighbor from across the street came over. "I want to hire you for a job. Will you come over now and take a look at the house?" She asked. The man aggreed and they went over to her house. She led him to a room upstairs and showed him the room.
"I want you to paint this room blue." She said. The man nodded then ran to the window, opened it and yelled out of it "GREEN SIDE UP!"
Confused, the lady continued to the next room. "I want you to paint this room pink." She said. The man then AGAIN ran to the window, opened it and shouted out of it "GREEN SIDE UP!"
Now very confused, the lady just led him to the next room. "I want this room painted-" But before she could finish the man ran to the window "GREEN SIDE UP!"
The lady- now very aggatated- hurried up to him. "What is going on and why are you screaming 'green side up' out of my windows?" The man, fairly embarrassed, laughed.
"Sorry lady, but I've got two blondes laying sod across the street."

a blond walks into a bar and asks for a drink. Then the bar tender says first u have to tell me why there is a rope around your waste? And the blond says i tried to kill my self. The bar tender than says that shouldnt it be around your neck. The blond says she already tried that and says she couldnt breath.

Since I was a blonde, I can get away with telling these jokes.

A blonde goes to the doctor complaining of pain all over her body. The doctor asks her to show her where it hurts. "Everywhere I touch it hurts!" the blondes exclaims. After doing a few tests and finding nothing wrong, the doctor tells the blonde she has a broken finger!

Why can't blondes make Kool-Aid?.......they can't figure out how to get 2 quarts of water into that little packet.

Why can't blondes make ice cubes?.......they don't know the recipe.

How do you confuse a blond


put her in a round room tell her to go to the corner



How dose the blond confuse u


she tells u she found it

Why did the chicken cross the road?
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-To get to the chicks in the hen house!

One blonde says to the other blonde, "Which is farther away, London or the moon?"

The other blonde replied, "HELLLOOOOO, can you see London from here?"

Colton-

It's not a joke, but the thing that has made me laugh the hardest at the bike track would probably have to be when you, Jennifer Snow, and Cameron Giles were all in the Snow's car listening to Cher full blast.

Ps- Who won the Clifford vs. Barbie poll?

Barbie!!!!!!!!!!!! That was pretty funny. (clifford sucks)

No WAY! Clifford was TOTALLY WINNING, little punk.

(liar)

and BTW- Barbie is awsome, but i bet she's as spoiled as Jessica Simpson. CLIFFORD on the other hand is helpful and useful and RED and even after my crash on Thursday he wasn't dirty.

Two blondes decide they want to go fishing. They rent a boat and find a nice place out on the lake. Pretty soon they started catching lots fish. By mid afternoon, they both had their limit.
On their way back to the docks the first blonde asks, "That was awesome. Did you mark the spot so we can come back tomorrow?"
The second blonde replies, "I sure did. I put a big X on the boat so I know exactly where I was standing."
The first blonde throws her hands in the air and yells, "You're so stupid. How do you know if we'll get this boat again?"

A blonde decided she needed something new and different for a winter hobby. She went to the bookstore and bought every book she could find on ice fishing.

For weeks she read and studied every book, hoping to become an expert
in the field. Finally she decided she knew enough, and out she went for
her first ice fishing trip. She carefully gathered up and packed all the tools
and equipment needed for the excursion. Each piece of equipment had its own special place in her kit. When she got to the ice, she found a quiet little area, placed her padded stool, and carefully laid out her tools. Just as she was about to make her first cut into the ice, a booming voice from the sky bellowed,"There are no fish under the ice!"

Startled, the blonde grabbed up all her belongings, moved further
along the ice, poured some hot chocolate from her thermos, and started to cut a new hole. Again the voice from above bellowed, "There are no fish under the ice!"

Amazed, the blonde wasn't quite sure what to do, as this certainly
wasn't covered in any of her books. She packed up her gear and moved to the far side of the ice. Once there, she stopped for a few moments to regain her calm. Then she was extremely careful to set everything up perfectly -- tools in the right place, chair positioned just so, everything. Just as she was about to cut this new hole, the voice came again, "There are no fish under the ice!" Petrified, the blonde looked skyward and asked, "Is that you Lord?"

The voice boomed back, "No, this is the manager of the skating rink!"

Here's a Teacher Joke for Ya'll....

This past fall semester, at Duke University, there were two sophomores who were taking Organic Chemistry and who did pretty well on all of the quizzes, midterms, labs, etc. Going into the final exam, they had solid "A's."
These two friends were so confident going into the final that the weekend before finals week (even though the Chem. final was on Monday), they decided to go up to University of Virginia to a party with some friends.
So they did this and had a great time. However, they ended up staying longer than they planned, and they didn't make it back to Duke until early Monday morning. Rather than taking the final then, they found Professor Aldric after the final and explained to him why they missed it. They told him that they went up to Virginia for the weekend, and had planned to come back in time to study, but that they had a flat tire on the way back and didn't have a spare and couldn't get help for a long time. So they were late getting back to campus.
Aldric thought this over and agreed that they could make up the final on the following day. The two guys were elated and relieved. So, they studied that night and went in the next day at the time that Aldric had told them.
He placed them in separate rooms, handed each of them a test booklet and told them to begin. They looked at the first problem, which was something simple about free radical formation and was worth 5 points. "Cool" they thought, "this is going to be easy." They did that problem and then turned the page.
They were unprepared, however, for what they saw on the next page.
It said: (95 points) "Which tire?"

[color=red]OK HERES A GOOD JOKE. LONG ONE BUT OH WELL.

THERE WAS A BLONDE, A BRUNETTE, AND A RED HEAD.

THEY WERE ALL STRANDED ON AN ISLAND.

THE SWIM BACK WAS A MILE LONG.

THE BRUNETTE SAID, "I'LL GO GET HELP." SO SHE SWAM HALF WAY GOT TIRED AND DROWNED.

THE RED HEAD SAID, "I'LL GO GET HELP." SO SHE SWAM HALFWAY GOT TIRED AND DROWNED.

SO THE BLONDE SAID, "I'LL GO GET HELP." SO SHE SWAM HALFWAY GOT TIRED THEN SWAM BACK![/color]

GET IT?